Guys, 7 Things You Should Do For a 1st Date

{By Kyle Griesinger}

As a guy, I know that planning dates is one of the most stressful things you can do.

It can feel as though there is overwhelming pressure to come up with something original, endearing, and charming, just like in a Hollywood movie. News flash: Hollywood movies have dozens of writers that think up those dates, and every part is scripted. And guess what? Your special girl probably doesn’t really care that much about whether it’s perfect. The thing that probably means the most to her is that you took the time and effort to plan something special for the two of you.

7 things to know before your first date

Nevertheless, planning a date can still be stressful! I mean, you really do want to come up with something that’s as special as she is. So here are some tips to impress your special girl:

1. Listen to her.

There is a reason this is number 1. This is the easiest way to plan a great date. When she tells you something that she likes, take note. That is prime date material! And don’t just pay attention to the big stuff. The little stuff is just as important, if not more important. If she says mentions favorite candy is Lindor Truffles then bring her some the next time you pick her up for a date. If she mentions that she loves roses give her a bouquet, or plan a trip to a botanical garden as a surprise.

When you pay attention to what she says and then incorporate it into your dates she will notice and it will mean a lot. Paying attention to what she says communicates that you value her and care about her opinion.

2. Don’t assume that dinner and a movie are always enough.

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with dinner and a movie. My point is simply that sometimes you should do something more special than just a cookie cutter date night. It really ties back to tip #1. If you are listening to her, then you should know what she likes. Use that information. Also, consider incorporating things that are special between the two of you. Take her to that restaurant where you had your first date, or go to the place you first met. Any place or thing that holds significance in your relationship will make a very sweet date.

I am hesitant to suggest this because it should be done with caution but if you are farther along in your relationship it can be very romantic. Take her somewhere that is significant in your life. This is a really neat way to let her behind the curtain of your life and allow her to really get to know you better. Whether it’s taking her to the diamond where you played Tee Ball, or to your favorite state park where you used to go camping with your family. Letting her into your story like this can be powerful, sweet, and romantic.

3. Bring a token of affection with you.

Yes, its old fashioned, but it’s also incredibly sweet! Seriously though, it’s not that hard to pick up some chocolates or a bouquet of flowers before you pick her up. It’s not that expensive either! I mean, you’re going to spend 3 times as much to get the new halo game when it comes out! When it comes to what you should bring, listening to her should give you some clues. But if you really don’t know yet, you can’t go wrong with half-dozen or a dozen red roses.

In the old days tokens of affection were a big deal. They let the girl know that you were interested in her, and that you were trying to impress her! In today’s “disinterest is cool’ culture it is frowned upon to be perceived as interested and eager but those aren’t bad things! I’m going to let you in on a secret that I really shouldn’t have to tell anyone: girls like it when you’re interested in them. They like to be impressed and treated well. I know, shocker! But seriously, it’s sweet and endearing. She might look at you funny the first time but it will score you major points in the long run. For more old fashioned dating tips check out this article.

4. Don’t be afraid of embarrassment.

I know, the possibility that you will say or do something embarrassing can be paralyzing. But it’s really not that big of a deal. For example, once on a first date I accidentally hit a tree with my car. She still teases me about it; and, you know, it’s become a fun joke between us. On the other hand some people worry about embarrassing themselves so much that they just end up being awkward the whole time, and that kind of embarrassment isn’t fun for anyone.

5. Be there. In the moment.

Turn your dang phone off. Just turn it off.

You are on a date with a beautiful girl! Nothing annoys me more than seeing a couple on a date buried in their phones. What’s even worse is when the girl is talking, and the guy isn’t paying any attention. Don’t be that guy. But more than just turning your phone off you need to live in the moment. Enjoy the time you have with her. Give her your full, undivided attention. Isn’t she worth it?

6. Pick up the check.

Again, it may be old fashioned, but it’s a nice gesture. It communicates that you are interested enough to try and impress her. I am not saying that you should always pay for everything, or that girls should never offer to pay. Just as a general rule, I try to pick up the check as much as possible. In my opinion, you should always pick up the check on the first date.

7. Walk her home.

Well, perhaps not literally. Most, of the time you are going to drive to your date. So, you probably aren’t going to be able to walk her home. But when you get back to her house, don’t just drop her off at the curb. Park, get out of the car, open her door if you’re fast enough, and walk her to the door. It’s sweet and courteous. If you met up somewhere, walk her to her car and then go get in yours.

Hopefully you’ve enjoyed the article and found it useful. I would like to give you one more tip though, and this tip really trumps all other tips. In fact, I have no fear in saying that this tip could save most relationships. Here it is:

It’s not about you.

Yes, it really is that simple. If you can remember this one tip then you will improve all of your relationships. Relationships are always about the other person, about serving them, about putting their needs above your own.

John 15:13 (AMP) says “No one has greater love [no one has shown stronger affection] than to lay down (give up) his own life for his friends.” Most people assume that this mean that the greatest thing you can do for someone you love is to die for them. And while I don’t necessarily disagree with that, I take a slightly different interpretation of it. To me it could also be said “Greater love has no man than this, that he die to himself for his friend.” To me, this verse means laying down your own wants and needs in order to fulfill those of someone else.


What are some of the best dates you’ve ever been on? Leave a comment and let us know!


  1. […] By Kyle Griesinger originally posted in InsideOut Magazine […]

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